Sunday, July 24, 2011

Breathe In, Breathe Out.....

Last Tuesday I had my Nursing Orientation meeting..I went in excited and full of butterflies. I came out - crying. Not because my feelings were hurt or that I was scared, I was (am) overwhelmed....

Part-time work, Full-time school, Full-time mom, wife, and friend. How can I do all this? How will I keep up? Will there be days that my kids won't remember what I look like because I'm either at work, school, or have my nose stuck in a book? I am so fearful of the busyness. I don't want to sacrifice all my time with my kids for a degree....But becoming an RN will benefit us all - and 4 semesters is just a season of our lives.

I work solely for insurance - this is an answer to our prayers as we have great coverage for the entire family through Porter Hospital. So, I can't quit my job - or even cut back hours.

I will have classes at least two days a week, clinicals at least one night a week, and work 1-2 week nights and every other weekend. Oy!

When I called Mike he could hear the fear in my voice. He said we'd take it a day at time. He is so good; both for me and to me. He is not afraid of hard work - at his day job and with our kids. There is no chore that he won't do - I am blessed beyond belief to have him. I love that he believes in me, and stands right by my side to help me.

So, what am I going to do?

Breathe in and out. Slowly and calmly. I am going to go to my Father, daily - perhaps by the minute, and lay all of this at his feet. I will trust that He will perfectly work out Insurance for us. That He will provide a sitter for the kids. That He will help me balance it all.

I trust in His perfect and beautiful plan. He has blessed me ABUNDANTLY and I will continue to trust in and walk with Him.

Wednesday, July 20, 2011


It's been far too long since I have blogged!

This is due partly to summer classes (Math and Life Skills), partly to family and work, and mostly, due to life! Isn't it funny how weeks can just fly and when we look back we see that all we've done is survive?

I have noticed that all I have done is make it thru each day - not thinking about the footprint that I've left behind. I'm working so hard to be everything to everyone and to get at least a C in my math class. I have neglected to spend time with my Father - and that is why this stress has crept in and taken root in my heart. I am a bit of a control freak and I feel like the more I worry - the better the outcome. Pretty dumb, right?

Lionel Young spoke directly to my heart this past Sunday in his sermon. As I was blow drying my hair I prayed that God would take my burden and allow me to worship and learn. And He did just that! I lifted my hands and my voice and took notes. What a beautiful let down of worries!

My God told me that He will grant me what I ask in His name. So I am fervently praying that He will lead me into Nursing school this Fall - meaning that I will pass Math with at least a C. I have 2 tutors, and am working hours on it every day. I am doing  my part to work hard, and also trusting in God's plan for my life....